A rodeo is great entertainment. But do you know what might be even better? A cat rodeo.
No, really. Given the wild popularity of cat videos, and the fact that cats don’t do anything you want them to, we think this concept has some serious potential. Here are some potential events:
Laser barrel racing
Similar to barrel racing with horses, cats would race around barrels in the familiar cloverleaf pattern. How exactly would you get them to do that? With a laser pointer. Each cat will be timed on how quickly they follow the elusive red dot to the finish line.
While the cat is in the arena, its owner walks to the center of it and calls for the cat. The cat receives points for how well it ignores the calls. In a second round, owners are allowed to use whatever form of bribery they choose.
A cat and a small herd of mice are released from separate gates at the same time. The cat is timed on how quickly it can catch a mouse and place it on the welcome mat at the center of the arena.
In this modified version of pole bending, five people stand side by side in a line, their feet shoulder-width apart. The cat weaves through the legs from one end to the other and back again, rubbing them as they go. It is a timed event, but points also are awarded for any human affection elicited in the process.
A large number of cats are released into the arena. Humans have one minute to herd as many cats as possible into an enclosure. Cats earn points for each time they avoid containment.
A cat and a dog are released from gates at the same time from opposite ends of the arena. A pole with a perch is placed in the center of the arena, and the cat must outrun the dog for eight seconds before it climbs the pole.
The catnip clown’s wild antics get the audience laughing while it does the very important job of distracting cats in order to keep everyone safe in the arena.
A cat and person are released into the arena, where a tall shelf lined with breakable objects of various sizes is located. The cat must climb the shelf and begin knocking over the objects before the person can catch them. Cats receive points for items that hit the ground before they are caught.
Various-sized boxes are placed in the arena. When released, the cat must find the smallest box it can fit into and curl up inside. The remaining available space is measured, and the cat with the least space wins.
Alas, a cat rodeo has yet to make its way to our region. Until it does, the Lewiston Roundup will have to hold you over:
WHAT: Lewiston Roundup
WHEN: 6:59 p.m. today, Friday and Saturday
WHERE: Lewiston Roundup Grounds, 2100 Tammany Creek Rd., Lewiston
COST: Free to $23/person with advance tickets, available at www.lewistonroundup.com or at the Little Red Barn in the North 40 Outfitters’ parking lot.
MORE INFO: The Lewiston Roundup parade begins at 9:59 a.m. Saturday along Main St. in Lewiston